Black & White & a Golden Calf

I recently have been noticing my tendency to black-and-whitenize things. Specifically I do this to my tasks and ideas. I like to post about what I've been up to and then separately post about what I've been learning. But really, what I keep busy with has everything to do with what God's been teaching me lately. I'll try to do better at integrating these two from now on:)

So, over the last month a whirlwind of activity has passed through my life. My brain can hardly keep up with it all some days - But thank the Lord for Coffee, a wonderful brain stimulant. :) Since my last post, I have submitted my nursing application and classes have started back up. It has been almost literally insane trying to get everything together for my nursing app. There have been so many last-minutes rushes, unexpected turns, and out-of-my-control situations - and I'm so thankful for all of these things. I can get so over-confident in myself that I get to thinking the best thing is if I just micromanage every aspect of this process, and God has repeatedly removed that ability from me, I believe, to teach me that it's not my job to be in control. I thought I was on top of making sure I filled out my nursing application early enough to be able to submit it as soon as possible, which I thought was January 1st. And then I found out when a classmate told me that she had just submitted her application in November that I had looked at the wrong dates. The app opened up for submission in October, and January 1st was the date they recommend you submit your application by at the latest, and February 1st is the actual deadline. Surprise! Well, no biggie because as long as it is submitted by February 1st, I'm still good. On to ordering my transcripts. Usually this just takes 5 minutes online and voila! you're good to go! Welp, turns out the nursing application requires that a form be sent to the institutions you're requesting a transcript from and they have to include the form in the envelope with the official transcripts. Aaaand none of the schools I've attended have ever heard of this. So this meant that I needed to call each school individually (multiple times because it's tricky to get a hold of people in a different time-zone within their office hours without hitting their lunch hour, my work hours, or disrupting school too much at the Leggott house), speak with their higher-ups, and then send an email with the form attached (which means scanning the form and turning it into a pdf). I went to 4 different colleges. So repeat that process 3 more times and we're finally good to go. With all this extra work, it was January 3rd when I finally had every transcript ordered and then I saw that the website says it can take up to 4-6 weeks for them to receive and process my transcripts. I felt like I was doing everything in my power to get things done timely and efficiently and yet everything was working against me. 4 weeks would put me past the Feb. 1st deadline. And then God reminded me that it is not for me to worry and to control everything, it is for me to be faithful to trust Him, and if He wants me in nursing school He will guide the process. The next week all but one of my transcripts had been received and processed. Cue the next unexpected turn. Then I received an email saying that my coursework from NTBI was not listed correctly on my application, and another email from NTBI apologizing that due to some understandable reasons my transcript that was ordered 12/16 (the first and easiest one I ordered), was not mailed until 1/13/14. Cue me taking things back in my hands to freak out for a sec. Cue surrendering again.

This reminds me of Exodus 33 right after the Hebrew's little golden calf fiasco. As the children of Israel are beginning to move on from there, Moses clarifies something with God. He says, "If Your presence does not go with us, do not lead us up from here." (Ex. 33:15). Basically, "We're not doing everything right, and you, God, have the right to be angry, but just so you know, if you ever decide not to go with us, we're not going." I want this to be the attitude I carry as I enter this semester and work through my application confusions - God, let me never walk on ahead with you. If your presence does not go with me, I'm not going. I don't want to be anywhere that God's not going with me. This whole school business is a lot to carry, and it's a waste of my time if God isn't with me in the midst of it. I'm encouraged that He is so faithful and is so in control. I'm still working out the issue with the way the courses are listed on my application, but I was encouraged that after conferring with the UNMC rep here, that she said my NTBI transcript should still be processed in time.

Outside of this, I've enjoyed 2 fun-packed weeks with my brother Chris visiting. He left this past Saturday after we both got to help with the AIM Cheyenne mime team's training camp on Friday. Classes are up and running here at school and I'm tutoring for chemistry 4 hours a week, which I love and get paid for! Hopefully over the next month I'll get a chance to catch up with some friends and do some video calling!

By His grace,

Jessica